Two Worlds Collide

I'm fulfilling two assignments at a time today.  I signed up to be a blogger for Compassion and this is the first assignment that I'll be doing for them.  And for the last several months I have been part of the God-sized Dream Team with Holley Gerth and about 100 other women...we've been sharing on Tuesdays little bits of this dreamy life we're called to live.

Today these two paths merge.

The GSDT assignment is to write about our favourite non-profit organization and Compassion happens to be mine.  Compassion's assignment is to imagine life as a mother in another country...so here goes.

A few years ago we had the opportunity to visit Compassion International's headquarters in Colorado.  We loved the time they spent with us showing us what they do and how the money we send them every month gets used to make life better for our sponsored child in Ecuador, Jordy.

With Mother's Day already a memory I have been pondering what my life would have been like had God decided to plant me somewhere besides this affluent society I happen to be a part of.

I wouldn't have as many living children as I do.  All of my kids have needed intense medical intervention at some point in their life.  Josiah couldn't get out on his own, there's a possibility that both of us wouldn't have made it left on our own.  Abby would probably be okay. Sam would have died due to the complications associated with his heart condition.  Sasha would have survived birth but probably not the burst appendix.  Elizabeth was premature and required neo-natal care, she, too, probably wouldn't have survived.  I'm certain I would not have considered raising a stranger's child who also had plenty of medical issues and would have succumbed to croup early on.

In my imaginary world I have only one child to care for and that child needs medical attention for heart problems she has recently developed.  But I probably wouldn't be as concerned about that as I would be about making sure she had a good education, food, water, clothing and shelter.  These would be my main concerns.  I no longer have a husband because he, too, died for lack of medical care.  It is common in our village.

Her job would be to collect water from the village well, if there was one.  Together we would try to coax the dirt into growing something that we could eat.  Our entire existence would be one in which we look for and try to find ways to gather food and resources.  She would not have the option of ballet or jazz, piano or guitar.  She could sing, but perhaps she wouldn't feel like singing.

I have dreams for my daughter.  She is smart and beautiful.  She could get out of the cycle we live in.  She could have a store or go to the city and work for someone.  I do not have dreams for myself.  Maybe I did once, but that was long ago.  I can dream for my daughter.

As a mother in poverty I watch carefully over my daughter.  I have been approached more than once to sell her, but I will not do that.  Many daughters have disappeared and never come back.  I know that evil men are making money from the bodies of these young girls.  I watch her carefully, she does not leave my side or go off on her own, it is too dangerous.

There is a school that missionaries have set up in our village, she is safe there during the day and she loves to learn...oh how she loves to learn.  Some foreigners explain to me one day that my daughter has been sponsored.  That means she will be able to continue in school, she will have clothes and food.  Our village will have a clean well.  I am weak with relief.

My daughter teaches me things that she learns in school.  I learn how to make jewelry that I can sell.  She is able to get the medical attention she needs.  My life and my daughter's life are changed because of sponsorship.  We write to the foreigners and try to explain in a few words how thankful we are.  My burden is lifted. My daughter will have a better life than mine and that is all that I want.

Sponsorship does not require that much in our western world.  $41/month is a small percentage of my grocery budget a month.  Less than what I spend on milk per month.  Less than one pair of shoes.  But it does so much.  Consider sponsoring a child today and help make their dreams come true.

Click HERE to help rescue Babies and Mothers from poverty.  Your gift can do so much.  I am linked HERE, see how you, too, can be a Voice For Mothers.

Click HERE to join our GSDT team and links to their favourite non-profit organization.

He infiltrated my 'to-do' list...

I have much to say at the moment and yet my brain is not helping me make coherent thought.

Yesterday was Tuesday which means I was supposed to be writing about God-sized dreams.  Our assignment was to spend some time with God, listening for His voice in regards to our dreams.  I am not opposed to quiet times or listening to God our writing about it but I have to admit that the assignment felt like a heavy weight when I first read it.  It felt like a 'have-to'...and I am so weary right now.

This has been an arduous week. (you do NOT have to read all of this...)

Wednesday morning:  beloved Auntie goes to be with Jesus, the world is not so bright without her

Wednesday evening:  sister-in-law and I travel through ridiculously ugly roads to get to a conference

Thursday: sit in conference learning why my RAD son is the way he is

Thursday afternoon:  run to the mall to help my husband wrangle kids while one of them is at the eye specialist, decide to keep the two girls because yet another 'spring' storm is making it's way through the province and my wise husband doesn't think I'll make it back to use the symphony tickets we bought for the girls for their birthdays Saturday night

Friday: keep girls busy while still attending the conference

Saturday: pleasant day hanging out with old friends and attending the Disney symphony with my girls - a wonderful oasis in the storm but NOT at home with my grieving family

Sunday: my family makes an extra drive of about four hours to get me from the city so we can go to join the rest of the family for the viewing, funeral, etc.

Sunday afternoon and evening: viewing, crying, hugging and another night away from home

Monday: graveside service, funeral, more crying, hugging and travelling back home

Tuesday morning: lead Bible study I am totally unprepared for (thanks to my gracious friends, that was all good)

Tuesday afternoon : our dog goes missing

Wednesday morning:  our daughter has another episode of racing heart and shortness of breath...

By the time I got home on Monday night I was emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted.  However, on Tuesday afternoon I sat down to read for a little while because I have a book I need to review and I needed to rest. I figured I could cross both things off my to-do list at the same time, very efficient of me, yes?

In the midst of the pages of this story God so graciously spoke to me of dreaming and not settling for something less.  He spoke to me of understanding where I am so that I can know where I am going.  He spoke to me through a story that my dream IS important, that I shouldn't settle for anything less than what He has dreamed for me, even if it might take work and I might not see results for awhile, and it may be in the midst of difficulty, all these things make me more of me.  These storms will help to shape and define and bring greater clarity into the dreaming.

Dreaming is important enough to Him to include it in the pages of a novel that I need to review to remind me that He was thinking of me, even though I wasn't thinking about Him. He knows that I learn better through stories, that I can hardly wade through a 'teaching' book. Reading that novel was on my to-do list and He wasn't, but He got in there anyway and I am in awe of His care for me...

This post is written as part of a community of God-sized Dreamers.  We hang out with Holley Gerth and link up on Tuesdays for encouragement and engaging the community in dreaming big!

ps.  I'll post a review of the book later this week!  It's called, The Gate.

Living a God-sized Life

You’re reading a God–Sized Dreams post. Each Tuesday, a team of God-sized dreamers writes on the progress of their dreams, spurred by the wisdom in Holley Gerth’s new book, You’re Made for a God-Sized Dream: Opening the Door to All God Has for You. This week’s question is: What’s a typical day in your life like right now? How can you see God’s hand in the middle of the “small” and ordinary too? (I borrowed this blurb from Mandy, cause it looked good and she's so smart! - go read her blog over here!)

The way my day looks and way I want it to look are vastly different.

What I want is idyllic and perfect.  Rising from my fragrant bed to happy children kissing their mother.  Delightful smells emitting from the kitchen by some miracle before I have awakened.  My husband would lead us in a rich, insightful time of scripture and prayer.

We would then gather around the table for learning together.  The dishes and laundry and cleaning and finances would all be taken care of in due time, nothing late, no debt and I would always look put together and well rested.

We would sit down to candle-lit meals prepared and beautifully presented with zero mess in the kitchen.  All would gladly bless their mother for her amazing talents in the kitchen.  After volunteering to do the dishes and tidy the kitchen the children would go off to practice instruments, study the stars and read Chaucer whilst my gentleman and I would entertain those who need our counsel and prayer.

**SCREECH**

(or some other awful sound to bring you back to reality )

More often than not the younger kiddos are all awake and reeking havoc in the kitchen while the teen-agers are fastidious in their need of a pillow.  Breakfast is most likely toast and cereal.  We do try to read the Bible and pray together every morning but often that time is punctuated with correction and direction to someone who is doing something that is less than idyllic.

Four of our kids go to the local public school and two of them study at home.  These two are mostly independent in their learning so my job is to be the whip-cracker and make sure they are getting their assignments in, there is not so much direct impartation of knowledge as there was when they were young, I miss that and am glad at the same time that it doesn't take up so much of the day, leaving it open for my dreamy pursuits.

My dreamy pursuits look a lot like trying to find the floor of the laundry room, cook something edible and find the piece of paper that my husband needs to go to the accountant.

Somewhere in the course of my day my heart longs to create.

To put words out there that might encourage someone.

To take fabric and thread and delight someone's senses.

To meld paper and glue and bits and pieces and encourage someone with a card or get down the memories that make our family what it is.

Some days I get to do those things.  I dream of being gracefully disciplined so I can do those things.  My purpose, my destination is to share with others what I have been given, whether that's in words, or fabric or paper, on a screen or in person.  Today I am going to go lead a Bible study that is probably more for my benefit than those of the participants because I so desperately need to learn these truths myself.

I am learning to make shorter 'To Do' lists and give myself grace for the day.  I am trying to impart that grace to my children and at the same time motivate them to reach high and believe they can do it.  Today I will probably get frustrated that they aren't moving in the direction they are supposed to (already did *sigh*), I might even yell at them.  I will do laundry and cook something.

And I will keep on dreaming and living this life that is a dream come true.  I am surrounded by the love of an amazing man, I have six beautiful children that love me (most days!).  I live in the country where I am surrounded by fresh air and an abundance of life, even though it is still covered by thick snow.

This is my God-sized life and I am blessed to live in it every day.  It may not be idyllic or perfect or even enviable, but it is mine and if I'm really honest, I love it.  Sure I would like to tweek it, take out some debt, put in some more downtime...but we're on a journey to that place and I don't want to miss a thing!

I am just one of many God-sized dreamers, please come on over to Holley's site and be encouraged by reading a few of my sister's 'day-in-the-life' accounts!

Inspiration from the Past - George and Gladys, 2 of my Heroes!

Who inspires you? What stories do you gravitate towards when you need a lift?  Quite possibly you are inspired by those stories because there is something of your dream in those who have already reached the place you long to be.

I am always inspired by stories of great faith.  People like George Mueller and Gladys Aylward inspire me to go after God, to ask the seemingly impossible things.

There was no breakfast for the children and yet Mr. Mueller had the children gather around the empty table and thanked God for food that wasn't there.  A knock sounded on the door.  The baker had been prompted by God to get up early and bake bread for the children, did they need bread?  Another knock at the door.  The milk wagon's wheel was broken and the milk would be spoiled before they could fix it, could the children please drink the milk?  I so love hearing of God's faithfulness.

If you're unfamiliar with Mr. Mueller there are many books published that describe his life and works. (Christianbook.com has several versions of his biography).  In a nutshell, this man had a heart for the poor.  He saw their need and went with God to try and meet it.  He established orphanages and prayed in the resources, never announcing what was needed.  There are countless stories of his faith and the answers that came.


How could they get the gospel message into the remote villages?  There didn't seem to be a way.  One day they had an elite visitor to the inn.  Could Ms. Aylward become the foot inspector to the remote villages?  The practice of foot-binding had been outlawed and they needed someone to travel and make sure that the gov't orders were being followed.  Ms. Aylward proclaimed that she would share the gospel of Christ as she went.  That didn't matter to their visitor, all he wanted was a foot-inspector.  That job paid the bills and allowed her to share the good news throughout the remote regions of China.

My kids love this version of her story.

Ms. Aylward is a similar type of character.  She was told she was unfit for missionary service, but her indomitable spirit pushed her forward.  She managed to take a rather large herd of children through the mountains in China and get them to safety, putting her own health in peril.  She, too, had faith to believe that God was more than able to supply what they needed and He did.


When I look at how these people put their faith into action, believing God for the impossible, it encourages me to do the same.  The dreams I have for our family and the ministry we long for with them seems impossible to me.  Yet our God says that with Him, nothing is impossible.  We have already seen answers to prayer that looked impossible from the a human perspective.

Sometimes we get discouraged by the mountains that are in front of us.  We have to move around roadblocks, climb over obstacles and find new pathways to the goal.  However, God says to look at the mountain and not be dismayed.  He made that mountain and He can move it if need be.

Be encouraged today friend.  If that dream you have is put there by the almighty God, know that the resources you need to accomplish it are on their way.  The current circumstance may seem bleak and unfavourable but know that the God of heaven has heard your prayer and is on His way to answer it.


Come on over to Holley Gerth's site see what inspires God-Sized Dreamers to go forward in their dreams.

Taking a Plunge: Introducing: Button Beauties

I am sticking my neck out a little here on the blog and reaching for one of my dreams at the same time.  All because I am a sucker for a challenge!! {In November Kelly challenged me to wear skirts/dresses for 30 days just to see if I noticed any difference in my attitudes, etc.  I couldn't resist so I did it.} 

But that is not today's challenge or post.  Last night he challenged me to see if I could make $300 in one week.  A little spending money for our trip (dream #14). If you're not sure what I'm talking about then you can read about it over here - my crazy God-sized dream. 

Disclaimer:  I cannot make 10 dolls in one week...well maybe I could but my family might wonder who the crazy woman is and why they aren't getting fed and have no clean clothes!

He thought maybe I could do something through writing but I'm pretty certain the publishing/writing world just doesn't move that quickly.  For some of my longest readers...remember the 'fresh flowers journal

Before Christmas, however, a young friend asked me to make her some dolls for some little girls she knew.  She had a 'look' in mind and so I drafted a pattern and these little lovelies came to life, designed and produced by me.

Introducing:  

Button Beauties

Some of you who saw the pictures on Facebook wondered if I would be making more.  So here's my deep breath plunge. (It appears I have a little issue charging money for things I make.)  I will take orders for 10 of these dolls (for now anyway, I feel that I could do that many in a reasonable amount of time).  I am going to charge $30/doll (if they need to be shipped that cost will be added on).

You can send an e-mail to me with the following information to help me craft your one-of-a-kind doll.  

E-mail:  laniwiens@yahoo.ca

In the subject line please put: "doll order"  

Then I need to know:

1. eye color (brown, green, blue, black)

2. a color that the little girl likes

3. preferred hair color and style (choose from straight, ponies (1 or 2) or up)

4. 'skin' color (dark, light)

5. any particular interests (these don't always have a bearing but as you can see, the 'Elizabeth' doll has ballet shoes and a tutu.  She was made for my own little dancer girl)

6. Delivery Date:  when does she need to be in your hands? (if you are from far away please keep shipping times in mind - and that I'm going away for 2 weeks in the middle of March!)

*the dolls are made using 100% cottons, acrylic yarns and bits of this and that :) 

*I use buttons and snaps and try to avoid velcro.  

*Each little girl has underwear to keep things modest!  

*They are 24" tall.  

*All the joints (legs/shoulders) are attached with buttons, just for fun!

*payment will need to be made before I will ship (I have a PayPal account and may just have to figure out how to use it!  However, cheques and cash (locally) are fine or money orders.)

*Theoretically they should be totally washable but I have not yet thrown Lizzy's doll into the washing machine (just being totally honest!)

Cost: $30 plus shipping

Let me introduce you to my girls!

This is Esme.

Esme has a pretty little headband with a hand-crafted flower.

Meet Mila.

Elizabeth - the ballerina!

I tried to get a good picture of her bun but it proved a little difficult!

UPDATE:  My cart is not yet full so if you would be so kind as to share this post on your facebook page or by word of mouth I would so appreciate it!!  If you share and someone you know decides to buy one, have them mention your name and I will send you a little giftie for your referral!!

Crossing off #14

I'm a dreamer and I often set super unrealistic goals for myself.  

I am also a perfectionist whose worth is far too often tied up in what I can do and how well I can do it.

I am a 'good girl' who doesn't want anyone catching her making mistakes/being weak/screwing up.

But this year, I am trying something new.  It's called grace.

This year I am trying to allow myself some breathing room.

In her book, The Do What You Can Plan, Holley Gerth encourages us to set a goal that is short term...a small goal, and then cut it in half.

Last week our assignment was:
Do one thing to move forward in your God-sized dream. You get extra credit if it’s simple, small and takes just a few minutes.

If you've read my God-sized dream you may recall that there isn't a single item on that list of dreams that isn't HUGE!!  {I wrote it before she started giving us assignments}

One goal I didn't write down was my desire to finish unfinished projects before I get going on new ones.  There isn't a huge list, but it's daunting enough.  My husband threw out a challenge.  We've been talking for the last year about celebrating our 20th anniversary (#14 on The List).  We decided on a cruise.  He told me that if I could get our accounting caught up on our farm books we would book one.

That was a challenge I couldn't pass up.  So I rolled up my sleeves and got to work girlfriends...a cruise was calling my name.  I petered out for a few days and then pulled up those bootstraps and kept going...I got to the end of September and realized that all I had left to do was file that GST report and in the government's eyes...we were caught up.

So on Tuesday last week, when Holley gave that assignment, guess what small thing we did?  We filed that report and booked ourselves on a cruise people!!!  It only took  a few minutes for that report to get filed even though hours of work had gone into getting to that point.  I still have a bit more to do to get to year end and I just got the paperwork I need to get there today.

Not only that, but my diligence and discipline in that matter spurred my husband on to start the ball rolling on another two of the dreams on that list!  One domino goes down and more have to follow.

That wee bit of success is heady stuff.  I know there will be kinks in the road.  There will be roadblocks and fatigue.  However, I am beginning to believe that just maybe these dreams aren't just ours, they belong to God and we are his and I am going to keep moving forward.

This is the ship we're going on  ms Maasdam