The eve of turning 40.

Tomorrow I turn 40 years old. I will have officially completed four decades of living on this good earth. I am not ashamed of being 40, I think I've earned my years, some days I feel much, much older. Other days I feel like I can't possibly have lived so long already, I've only just gotten started.

However, tonite, on the eve of this momentous occassion I feel very blah. I'm tired after making the long drive home from my mom's. It was nice to visit, gather my little chickens around me once again and nice to head home. I'm tired, feel yucky after eating and drinking things I don't usually eat and drink in an effort to stay awake and should probably just go to bed.

Having your birthday at harvest time is a downer. Nobody is around because they're all busy in the field, there will not likely be a party except with the family at my in-laws house tomorrow evening. My husband is a wonderful man but planning events is not his forte - that's why he married me. Maybe I should have just planned a party for myself, however, that would have seemed a little vain don't you think? None of my kids got me anything or even made cards. I already know what my gift is from my husband, cause I told what he should do (I wanted all the beautiful gold chains that he's ever given me that my sweet babies have pulled off my neck repaired) and he did it.

I think perhaps I'm having a little pity party for one here, I'll behave myself in the morning and I will write my 40 thankful things, I promise. For now, my sweet husband is home from the field, it is 11:00 PM and I am going to go to bed so I'm not tired and cranky on my birthday.